"Being white means never having to think about it."

chrisnolansscarf:

chrisnolansscarf:

I heard if you whisper “alright alright alright” 3 times in front of a mirror Matthew McCounaughey appears and gives your career a makeover while spouting metaphorical life philosophies. 

but if you say more than 3 times André 3000 appears asking that you be on your baddest behavior.

comedycentral:

Click here to watch more of Jordan Klepper and Jessica Williams’s safety tips for college students from last night’s Daily Show.

mediapathic:

misandry-mermaid:

scandalouslyfollowing:

nuric:

cap-out-of-time:

schwoozie:

[x]

ooc: Reblogging because holy shit.

I aspire to be this woman when I’m older. 

YASSSSSSS!

This woman was born before women were legally allowed to vote.

So don’t think for a second that she’s joking when she sees you trying to take that right away, Republicans.

I will now see this woman whenever I hear this sample in Ministry’s Thieves.

"

Imagine this:
Instead of waiting in her tower, Rapunzel slices off her long, golden hair with a carving knife, and then uses it to climb down to freedom.
Just as she’s about to take the poison apple, Snow White sees the familiar wicked glow in the old lady’s eyes, and slashes the evil queen’s throat with a pair of sewing scissors.
Cinderella refuses everything but the glass slippers from her fairy godmother, crushes her stepmother’s windpipe under her heel, and the Prince falls madly in love with the mysterious girl who dons rags and blood-stained slippers.

Imagine this:
Persephone goes adventuring with weapons hidden under her dress.
Persephone climbs into the gaping chasm.
Or, Persephone uses her hands to carve a hole down to hell.
In none of these versions is Persephone’s body violated unless she asks Hades to hold her down with his horse-whips.
Not once does she hold out on eating the pomegranate, instead biting into it eagerly and relishing the juice running down her chin, staining it red.
In some of the stories, Hades never appears and Persephone rules the underworld with a crown of her own making.
In all of them, it is widely known that the name Persephone means Bringer of Destruction.

Imagine this:
Red Riding Hood marches from her grandmother’s house with a bloody wolf pelt.
Medusa rights the wrongs that have been done to her.
Eurydice breaks every muscle in her arms climbing out of the land of the dead.

Imagine this:
Girls are allowed to think dark thoughts, and be dark things.

Imagine this:
Instead of the dragon, it’s the princess with claws and fiery breath
who smashes her way from the confines of her castle
and swallows men whole.

"

'Reinventing Rescuing,' theappleppielifestyle. (via theappleppielifestyle)

This reminds me so much of Andrzej Sapkowski’s “The Last Wish”.

(via writtendark)

ultraprism:

"so you know, fuck you"

Yeah, fuck off, Blossom’s the bomb.

(Source: scavengervortex)

jennyowenyoungs:

tonythaxton:

This is one of my favorite things I’ve ever done.  I hope you will check it out and share it.  Introducing, The Beachie Boys! From the latest episode of @FelizNavipod. 

America’s Sweetheart, Tony Thaxton, has broken my brain by combining two of the best things ever… so seamlessly.

dakotamcfadzean:

The secret dies with me.

(Source: blog.dakotamcfadzean.com)